It was all too tense before the Leipzig game.

It was all too tense before the Leipzig game.

I am not talking about a wigwam and a Tepee here (too tense, get it? OK, please yourself!). 

With no known recognised striker we were going to be in the shit. We had to make the best of a no striker job.

I would have given Parrot a runout, or at least put him on the bench. Or… I would have tried Bergwijn up front, but Mourinho gave the top spot to Moura. It didn’t give us goals, but we did hold them off… well, until they got that lucky penalty (bastards!).

Of our home Champions League defeats, 38% have come against German opposition (three out of eight), also losing on home soil to Bayer Leverkusen in November 2016 and Bayern Munich in October. It makes one feel a bit spooked just reading such statistics… but then again, who is superstitious? They’ve been lucky… so far, but luck has a habit of turning against those that abuse their lucky charms. Besides, Any fool can have bad luck; the art consists in knowing how to exploit it, and that is what we must do.

RB Leipzig had 12 shots during the first half - the most they have ever had during the opening 45 minutes in an away Champions League match. But none of them managed to penetrate Lloris’ nest. So, a bit of positiveness here…

Tottenham are the sixth side Mourinho has managed in the knockout stages of the Champions League, the joint-most number of different teams one manager has taken charge of at this stage alongside Ancelotti (FC Porto, Chelsea, Inter Milan, Real Madrid, Manchester United and Spurs). So, that is his experience, now put that experience into good use, Jose.

Now we’ve glanced at the positives… (really, I am not feeling any better, I hear you shout…).

The big question for Jose Mourinho, against Leipzig, as at home, now away, will be in how we could have a knock around with Leipzig without our main strikers.  Unfortunately, it didn’t just rain on the night, the weather bombarded us, on and off the pitch, with hailstones (no pun intended). Let us hope by the time of the next match comes the weather will be that much calmer for us. Even though we had a much-improved second half, we could not apply consistent pressure to Leipzig, who will go into the second leg as firm favourites to reach the quarter-finals (not if we have anything to do with it!). But favourites or not, we are not going to allow the German’s to park their tanks on their lawn. We will give it all we’ve got and more. Luck always plays a significant factor in all games, competitions and knockout stages. So let us hope fate is with us at our next meeting.

After the heroics of last season, we won’t be written off by anybody. Ok, we haven’t got Kane and Son (did I mention that?), and it might be an outstanding feat if we were to overturn this deficit, but if anything, we have a steel of rod going through our backbones since Mourinho took over the helm. We are battling and battling, and nothing is over when one has such determination.

Mourinho said, on the night, 'We are really in trouble,’ but this is all mind games to a seasoned pro.

Also remember, silverware isn't really made of silver. Its made of sweat, determination, and a hard-to-find alloy called guts. And that is us… well, not I, but the team. My own guts are channelled in a different direction  (probably after last night, in the wrong direction).

Our shining lights on the day was our goalkeeper Lloris and midfield man Lo Celso, the France keeper preventing Leipzig from reducing the second leg to little more than a procedure. In the first minute of the game, Lloris can take credit for Leipzig not being out of sight already. And that is what I mean by “luck”. Maybe that is the luck that will turn it for us over in Leipzig?

As for Lo Celso, well, he showed his growing maturity as he drove us forward, almost equalising with a fine 25-yard free-kick that was turned on to the post by the stretching Gulacsi.

Yes, the night ended in frustration for us, but that doesn’t mean it will be the same in Germany. Even Alli was frustrated as he was caught on camera throwing his toys out of the pram. Yes, he picked up a bottle of water and then threw it down for dramatic effect (he probably knew the cameras were there or hoping the cameras were there, watching and lurking, as they always do). Oh, and don’t forget the boot he also hurled (another message to his manager). All this because he was substituted. God knows what would have happened if he hadn’t been picked to play!! He probably would play the records of Crash Test Dummies (yes, there is such a group… The Crash Test Dummies are a Canadian rock band from Winnipeg, Manitoba).

So, there you have it, ladies and gentleman… now we must summon the spirits of long-dead Spurs players to help turn this last 16 tie into winning ways. A tall order, but since Levy came to this club hurdles have been our staple diet.

Until our next meeting, we have to brush ourselves all over with a greasy rag and prepare to go into the den of rent boys… only one will come out rogered… hopefully, that will be Chelsea.

It has been a pleasure,